STATEN ISLAND, N.Y. -- You know that feeling of when youre on your death bed and youre thinking of all the things you didnt do in life? Yeah, I had that at 22.

Grasmere native Jacqueline Epstein, 26, is alive and thriving after overcoming a major obstacle life threw at her. After a traumatizing cancer diagnosis, Epstein is using her voice to raise money and awareness for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society -- a foundation that helped her four short years ago.

Ive always known Ive wanted to do music. said Epstein, who goes by the stage name Jaclyn. But it wasnt until my life was kinda life or death and I had this sense of regret that I really went for it.

Epstein graduated SUNY Purchase in 2016 and was getting ready to start the real world. Three months later, the singer noticed a lump on her clavicle bone. Initially, the artist said she didnt think anything of it, but she decided to get a professional opinion.

A LIFE-CHANGING DIAGNOSIS

After being evaluated by multiple doctors, Epstein was diagnosed with stage 3 Hodgkin lymphoma. Hodgkin lymphoma is 85 percent remediable, but Epstein happened to fall into the other 15 percent.

Nothing was working, the artist recalled. I did seven rounds of chemo at first and it didnt work. Then I did this thing called ICE and was hospitalized for three days every two weeks. And that didnt work either.

Epstein said her appearance at the time made her look like the spokesperson for cancer.

Unsure of where to turn next, the artist found a clinical trial through the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society that was in its early run. Epstein claimed the treatment killed 95% of the cancer. Paired with radiation and a major stem cell transplant, the artist knew she was on a long road to recovery. Epstein spent her time navigating through the lasting impact of cancer, including mouth sores and fatigue, and planning for her life outside of the hospital.

Her second chance was a sign for her to pursue her passion for music.

My mom would say to me, Your path will change a thousand times but the goal remains the same, Epstein said. At that time, the goal was to stay alive and be able to bounce back and make music. I had a feeling of regret in the hospital that I never want to feel again.

FAMILY SUPPORT, THROUGH THICK AND THIN

Epstein credits her parents, her sister, her fianc and her friends who stuck by her side through her treatments and, ultimately, her recovery.

Its easy to love someone when theyre at their best and theyre happy and cool, she said. I wasnt, and people still came through and helped me.

Before knowing she was sick, Epsteins parents gave her a year after she graduated college to pursue a career in music. She was actively going to music studios for three months until her health took a turn for the worse. She said that throughout her treatment she continued to write and create music, but at one point the prospect of her being able to sing again was in question.

One of the surgeries I did actually paralyzed my vocal chord, Epstein said. In the midst of my cancer treatments, my doctor said I might not be able to sing again. That was such a low for me. It felt like the only thing that was keeping me strong was just taken away.

But Epstein wasnt going to give up on her pipes that easily. She focused on training her voice and the paralysis went away. The artist expressed how grateful she was for the chance to continue creating music and wanted to take her gratitude to the next level.

MAKING A DIFFERENCE, ONE SONG AT A TIME

During the coronavirus (COVID-19) outbreak, Epstein donated a portion of the proceeds from her single Alive to the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. Pre-sales from her self-titled EP, due out Monday, will be donated to the foundation as well. Her upcoming album consists of five tracks.

Its all coming back full circle, she said. They helped me and this is the only way I know how to help. All Ive ever known is music. When I wrote the single, I would constantly tell myself, Youre alive. Remember why youre alive and keep going for what you want.

Epstein also plans on launching a line of merchandise with a portion of those proceeds going to the foundation.

For more information on how to pre-save Epsteins album Jaclyn, check out the artists Instagram page at @hellojaclyn.

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Cancer-surviving singer gives back to Leukemia and Lymphoma Society | Artists of the Island - silive.com